slidres is nuttng but PORNO!!!!! so THER

Date: 04/27/2000
From: Blinker


All right, so I admit I was slightly biased against Sliders hitting Sci-Fi from the start. It was starting its run just as my own fave show, Lexx, was finishing up its much-maligned fifth season on a cliffhanger which it now seems will never be resolved. Granted, all the Sliders shows currently airing were produced years ago and had no bearing on the Lexx cancellation decision, but still.

But THEN the channel starts airing these pornographic ads for Sliders right during the dinner hour. Some redheaded chick with giant... uhh, lips, moaning as she washes herself by a pond, or coming on to this guy in a steam room. Her breathily stated purpose: "I reproduuuce." Way to provide a female role model, gang. Plus those voiceovers with the slow-motion beam extending from a "timer," along the lines of "Ohhhhhhh yeahhhhhhh.... it's getting so much LONGER, and HARDER......" HellOOOO, phallic symbolism!! What sick production designer worked up that device??? And don't forget, we've got KIDS watching the tube at this point!

Nevertheless, I tune in for the "preview" episode Sci-Fi decides to air first. Hey, maybe the suits've just been misrepresenting things for the sake of ratings. Plot? Our supposedly ex-military skank whore swallows some magic vending machine slime that turns her into SUPER-SLUT, who blatantly defies the laws of gravity (in more ways than one) and bangs every stud in town.

ONE MORE CHANCE, I figure. And what's the next show they put up? Fat biker chicks with eight husbands! THIS is the new "alternate history" series that Marc Scott Zicree and Michael Reaves have worked on?!! Gimme a break!!! They couldn't even keep the damn slut's hair colour the same from one week to the next!!!!!!

Oh, and I'm informed by a reliable friend that the third ep was something about breeder-girl screwing the captain of a pirate ship. (rolls eyes)

Never mind that crap about Sci-Fi jacking the ep order. Lexx *NEVER* sank to *THIS* level. And THREE SEX-BASED EPS IN A ROW proves nothing less than that Sliders' creators should be SHOT.

So to conclude my carefully researched and balanced essay, SLIDRES SUXX!!!!!!!! lexx rulzzz

- Blinker 7:-I
http://welcome.to/gate_haven


BLINKER!!!

Date: 04/27/2000
From: Afl


Now, Now... Now take a deep breath and count to ten. Feel better?

*grin*

Actually, I see where you're going with this. Not a fan of LEXX either.

As far as Sliders is concerned...I agree with the below statement but...

"And THREE SEX-BASED EPS IN A ROW proves nothing less than that Sliders' creators should be SHOT."

...as far as the *creators* being shot...NO. Actually, we should insert the name Peckinpah or executive producers in the place of the creators. So this is how *I* think it should read.

eh hem [rattle paper]

And THREE SEX-BASED EPS IN A ROW proves nothing less than the Sliders' seasons 3-5 executive producer(s) should be SHOT. (This does NOT include Robert K. Weiss OR Tracy Torme since they are the *creators*.)

There...now doesn't that sound better. *grin*

AfL :)


YOU suck Blinker! (end!!!)

Date: 04/27/2000
From: SL4ever


Suck the fun out of the board when you're not around, that is. :-D

LOL as usual! Hee hee.

Awww , Blinker

Date: 04/27/2000
From: Stax_


Eases the pain .stax

Actually AfL...

Date: 04/27/2000
From: Blinker


I intended the opposite of what you apparently drew from this little satire. I *am* a huge fan of Lexx... and seeing Sliders fans slag off on it when all they've seen is an ultra-juvenile ad campaign and a few cheesy sex eps hand-picked by Sci-Fi really rankles. You see... they could easily have done the exact same to our show, and we'd have bungee bashers like my pastiche running around left and right.

- Blinker 7:-I
http://welcome.to/gate_haven

"Predecessors, I will avenge you..."

Awww.... Blinky,

Date: 04/27/2000
From: Slider_Sarah


LOL! I was laughing my ass off!!!

I saw Giga Shadow today... loved it.

Sarey Sare

Actually Stax_...

Date: 04/27/2000
From: Blinker


If you thought the first paragraph was true, it was actually just my reversing Sliders' and Lexx's situations as part of the satire. Lexx is currently airing Season Three outside the States and is waiting for a pickup on Season Four.

- Blinker 7:-/
http://welcome.to/gate_haven

Actually Blinker .....

Date: 04/27/2000
From: Stax_


I hate to break a trend . The " eases the pain " was a reference to the episode of the Simpsons in which Homer was watching McGarnicle .stax

Actually, TIP . . .

Date: 04/27/2000
From: TheIrrelevantPoster


TIP:This has nothing to do with you!!!!!!!!

Shut the fuck up TIP

Date: 04/27/2000
From: Bitch_Slap


or you will be bItCh SlApPeD!

shut the fuck up TIP

Date: 04/27/2000
From: Danza_Slap


or you will be dAnZa SlApPeD!

Blinker, the Swift of our BBoard!!

Date: 04/28/2000
From: ThomasMalthus


Very clever, Blinker, very clever indeed. What do you do for a living? You could easily be a professional writer and I'm not kidding. Please keep up the good work. You are the "Sliders"-loving equivalent of Jonathan Swift.

ThomasMalthus

Original URL http://bboard.scifi.com/bboard/browse.cgi/1/5/545/20233
Nominated by DMD

 

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